Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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