ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
