it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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