The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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