sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
