Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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