Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
