i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
