Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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