Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
