belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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