i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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