At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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