is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
