What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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