I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Randomize