she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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