Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
