Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
