Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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