We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
