The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
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