Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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