So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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