Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
