she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
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