He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
