So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
