he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
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