bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I want to fling myself into the sun
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
