we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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