She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
