Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
