so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
