We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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