It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
you made out with another girl for some wings
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
