I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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