Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize