So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize