Non-Jews are for practice
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Randomize
