i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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