Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Randomize