Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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