If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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