I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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