She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
