Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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