My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
She told me I should be a condom model.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Gay?
German.
Pity.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
