I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
