we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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