You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
We just shotgunned beers for America
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
