New invention idea: vibrating tampons
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Someone came in the potted fern
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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